Confession? Declaration?

About 5 years ago I started a fitness program with Total Health and Fitness. I did so well on the program. I started because I was having a hard time losing my pregnancy weight. In four months I lost 22 lbs and went from 35% body fat to 18.9% body fat. I was so proud of myself. A week or two before I finished the program I got pregnant with Megan. I quickly got out of the habit of exercising and eating really well. When I’m pregnant or nursing I have this weird thing where I literally can’t feel full. When I was almost done nursing Megan I finally started recognizing that I could feel full if I ate really healthy balanced meals. I didn’t gain any extra weight from that but I didn’t lose any of my pregnancy weight and I’m still carrying it plus a little more. Did I really just admit that?

I am starting Total Health and Fitness again today. I’m so excited. I really did enjoy this before. I’ve resisted going back because #1 I was embarrassed to go back, #2 it’s expensive, #3 its super hard work, and #4 I know everything I’m supposed to do anyway. I’ve started some other great fitness programs in the past few years but my heart just wasn’t into it. I’ve been way to stressed out and have felt too overwhelmed to really lose my weight before now. A year ago I finally started feeling better and just this month I’m feeling like I am starting to get on top of things again. I’m so excited to start this program! The program is really cool because you work with a trainer who customizes a fitness and nutrition plan for you. They weigh measure and test your body fat every week. Trust me – having a totally fit guy pinch your stomach fat is MOTIVATING!!! I hate that part so much but it really makes me want to work hard. This program is great for me but I do know a lot of people that hate it because you eat the same balanced meals every day for a week. It doesn’t bother me. I just love not having to think about what I’m going to eat next and knowing that what I’m eating is going to help me reach my goal. I'm way healthier eating this way because I tend to eat a lot of carbs when I don't have a plan.

Today I realized that I’m actually 10 lbs heavier than the last time I started. GEEZ! The good news is that I’m 7% lower in body fat than the last time I started. I’ve been working out and lifting weights the past 9 months with little change to my weight. I feel better but it’s nice to actually know that despite my lack of weight loss, I’m making changes to my body. Body fat changes are much more important than weight although I need both.

I'm leaving now to meet with my coach. I'm excited to set some goals.